The New Business Casual

As much as I hate working from home, it does have some advantages. Today I replaced my normal khakis and an oxford with a striking and sexy combination of a white tee-shirt and yellow boxers with bicycles on them as I worked away at my home office.

I realized at one point that any neighbors or passers-by could see in easily through a window, but didn't take any action as I figured that working in one's underwear is a liberty one can take when going through chemo. Other liberties I take include:

-Eating shamelessly high calorie food without guilt
-Renting golf carts for 9 holes
-Driving to work instead of biking
-Taking a midday nap when necessary
-Urinating anywhere outside (sometimes you've just got to go...)
-Publicly discussing bodily functions

This list is by no means exhaustive, but it's at least a good beginning.

Anyway, the last blood tests showed that I utterly lack an immune system at the current time which is why I'm working from home. Being here is beginning to bore me, however(as you can probably tell from the frequent blog posts). I think I might cheat and go back to the office for the rest of the week as today I had the bone pain that usually accompanies rising counts...

Finally, a video that most of you have probably seen, but is well worth watching for its humor and satire:

Protect Insurance Companies PSA from Will Ferrell

Take Care,

Sam

Nutritional Highlights

Is anyone else really tired of marketers shamelessly promoting junk food as healthy? Now, don't get me wrong, I like my guilty pleasures as much as anyone, but I distinctly and fondly remember a time when marketers were more honest and appealed to our baser interests -- our taste buds -- instead of twisted nutritional logic.

As I type, a box of Lucky Charms -- The upper class cousin of my favorite "Marshmallow Maties" -- sits at my desk. On the top of the box, a large banner reads "Whole Grain Guaranteed" and "Nutritional Highlights." On the bottom, a large banner reads "Good Source of Calcium and Vitamin D."

Now I don't eat Lucky Charms for the nutrition, I eat it for the marshmallowy deliciousness. I really hope that the American public does the same, but my training in market research suggests that Kraft Foods probably puts a lot of money into their marketing, and this empty rhetoric actually works.

The irony is, of course, that truly healthy foods (i.e. broccoli)has no packaging to promote its nutritious benefits. If food promotes its healthful benefits in a grocery store and loudly proclaims "Smart Choices Made Easy," then it probably isn't that healthy.

I'd protest by giving up my Marshmallowy treat, but its just too delicious to boycott. And, at least I can still talk like a leprechaun (or Pirate) as I eat them and they still leave games to play on the back of the box. I guess there's really just a little kid in all of us -- well, at least in me.

We're nearing the end of round #5, and my counts are once again hammered. Friday was spent getting blood transfusions, and today receiving what should be my last chemo of the round. Whenever my immune system gets this low I end up with the Top Gun theme "Danger Zone" stuck in my head for days -- Thank you, 1980s.

Comment Question of the Day:

What is your favorite unhealthy breakfast cereal?

Welcoming Autumn,

Sam

Walking into Mirrors...

I'm not sleeping too well these days. I lie awake in bed for hours at night, just to fall asleep in the wee hours of the morning and awake to find myself doing strange things like trying to walk through mirrors. As I explained to Katie, I was probably just trying to enter another dimension... Or, maybe it's just that I'm so good looking that I can't get enough of myself, even in my sleep...

Anyway, kidding aside, you all know from previous posts that I have some interesting sleep habits (disorders). In light of the strange sleep occurrences of the past couple weeks, I feel its appropriate to relay one of my favorite sleep stories.

Three years ago or so during Christmas break, my mom, dad, sister (Kate), my dog Junior, and I all piled into a car to head to Florida. Traveling with a young family is a normal event, but two empty-nesters driving two adult children plus a dog 1600 miles presents a comical situation in and of itself.

So, we left Madison in the evening and due to my father's need to "make good time," and chronic inability to stop and sleep when traveling (another genetic deficiency I unfortunately inherited), we arrived at our destination in Florida at around 2 in the morning.

Unfortunately all of the motels we checked had no vacancy, until finally we found one with a room at around 3am, but this one also had a giant "ABSOLUTELY NO PETS ALLOWED" sign in the front window of the office.

We decided to risk it and Dad went in to reserve a room. Upon entering our room, Dad let Junior (a dachshund, by the way) down to run. Just then a shady character exited the room adjacent and Junior went crazy barking.

Luckily, the office must not have heard the commotion, and we deftly scooped up Junior and headed into the room.

Exhausted all of us crashed and immediately fell into a comatose state -- Kate and Mum in one bed and Dad, Junior and I in the other.

I must pause and explain that I've learned that I tend to do crazy things in my sleep when:

1. I'm really sleep deprived
2. I'm in a foriegn place
-or-
3. I've been on the road for a long time

Now, this night all of these factors were at work and I awoke at 4 am with Junior barking wildly, me on my knees screaming at the top of my lungs holding my Dad's arms down above his head.

As I slowly come back to consciousness, I realize that my Dad, also asleep, is fighting back mightily and screaming himself.

Around this time, Kate wakes up to the commotion, sits straight up, and begins clapping her hands, screaming "STOP IT! STOP IT! STOP IT!"

Then, as quickly as the commotion erupted, Dad stopped screaming and rolled over, Kate, Junior and I went back to sleep, Mum mumbled something incoherently, and it was once again silent.

What the occupants of the adjacent room must have thought, I can only imagine. I only know that if I had heard the screaming, the commotion, and the dog going crazy, I probably wouldn't have gotten a whole lot of sleep in the thought that a mass murder had probably occurred one door over...

Neither Dad nor I know who started the screaming, and how we didn't get kicked out of the motel that night I will never understand.

Back to the present, on Saturday Dad and I went twilight golfing at The Bridges. I had a great time, but for the first time in my life rented a cart instead of walking the course. After six holes I was rather tired and decided I had best put down the clubs and play Caddy for the remainder of the night.

On Sunday I felt like I had run a marathon. It's a good sign you're out of shape when you can hardly move after six holes of golf...

As we near the end of stage 5, I'm rather worn out, but I suppose that is to be expected after nearly 10 months of chemo.

I hope this early fall finds you all well.

Off to Bed...

Sam

Insomnia

Insomnia is an uninvited guest
who stays in your bedroom
and rattles your sanity.

It is the close cousin of the crazed man
who drives incessantly through the night
with the bright lights of a city bypass
flashing rapidly at his windshield.

Insomnia gives audience
to the orchestra of crickets
just outside the window,

To the lonely sound of car tires
whose solo drivers depart
on unknown cross-town missions,

And to the chorus of excitable dogs
whose barks pierce the still, dark
air of a late summer night.

Mr. Schmidt... I just don't get you...

So said a student to my friend Schmidty on his first day teaching in Milwaukee. This made me laugh really, really hard and also made me feel old. When your peers assume positions of responsibility, it's a sign you're growing up.

I'll resist the push to grow up for as long as possible...

I know, I know -- It's been far too long since an update.

I've been doing generally well, tired from so many months of chemo, and trying to put all of my energy toward work.

Highlights/Notable events over the past few weeks include:

-Getting back to the office quite a bit (My favorite place to be right behind on the water...)

-A Sunday spent in the ER with vomiting and intense shoulder pain and a mystery diagnosis...

-A great weekend up north with Mum, Dad, Katie and my friends Pete and Annie.

Because there's a growing demand for more frequent updates, I'm going to begin posting random creative jibberish that I have no other use for. In this spirit, I present to you a poem written this evening:

The Sweet Smells of a Summer Stroll

It takes a cold heart
to not derive great pleasure
from the smells found
on a late summer stroll
through the outskirts of a city.

The strangely sweet smell
of freshly-mowed grass
mixes with the intoxicating scent
of freshly ground beef seasoned
heavily with lemon pepper
broiling over a bed of hot charcoal;
together, these scents warm my soul.

I suppose it is not the smells alone
that bring such great pleasure,
but more so the memories that they conjure.

In the careless years of childhood
spending hours playing catch barefoot
in the cool, soft grass
of a newly-mowed lawn
on a lazy summer Sunday.

In the careless years of college,
the festive impromptu backyard barbecues
where we’d grill beef and sweetcorn
while imbibing whatever libations we had on hand
filling the night with food, drink and merriment.

Remembering the many good days gone by
and the many more to come
I am filled with great cheer
as I walk among the quaint homes on Oakridge
and enjoy the sweet smells of a late summer stroll.