Monday, September 21, 2009

Nutritional Highlights


Is anyone else really tired of marketers shamelessly promoting junk food as healthy? Now, don't get me wrong, I like my guilty pleasures as much as anyone, but I distinctly and fondly remember a time when marketers were more honest and appealed to our baser interests -- our taste buds -- instead of twisted nutritional logic.

As I type, a box of Lucky Charms -- The upper class cousin of my favorite "Marshmallow Maties" -- sits at my desk. On the top of the box, a large banner reads "Whole Grain Guaranteed" and "Nutritional Highlights." On the bottom, a large banner reads "Good Source of Calcium and Vitamin D."

Now I don't eat Lucky Charms for the nutrition, I eat it for the marshmallowy deliciousness. I really hope that the American public does the same, but my training in market research suggests that Kraft Foods probably puts a lot of money into their marketing, and this empty rhetoric actually works.

The irony is, of course, that truly healthy foods (i.e. broccoli)has no packaging to promote its nutritious benefits. If food promotes its healthful benefits in a grocery store and loudly proclaims "Smart Choices Made Easy," then it probably isn't that healthy.

I'd protest by giving up my Marshmallowy treat, but its just too delicious to boycott. And, at least I can still talk like a leprechaun (or Pirate) as I eat them and they still leave games to play on the back of the box. I guess there's really just a little kid in all of us -- well, at least in me.

We're nearing the end of round #5, and my counts are once again hammered. Friday was spent getting blood transfusions, and today receiving what should be my last chemo of the round. Whenever my immune system gets this low I end up with the Top Gun theme "Danger Zone" stuck in my head for days -- Thank you, 1980s.

Comment Question of the Day:

What is your favorite unhealthy breakfast cereal?

Welcoming Autumn,

Sam

3 comments:

Mad Geo and the Tagliatelles said...

Hang in there Sam, I saw in a recent ad that the gelatinous emulsifiers in Lucky Charms do wonders for red blood cell vitality (they haven't found a better way to market this aspect of marshmallows but "vitality" is sufficiently un-defined that the FDA lets them get away with it).

I think you are giving the fruit and vegetable distributors too little credit in this blog post. I've seen stickers on bananas urging me to watch network television and I think I saw a micro-printed subliminal message on the inside of an orange peel once (but that could have been a side effect of the ginko/guarana/pomegranate-enhanced diet water that I chugged right before I saw the message).

Anyway, my favorite foods are the high-fat, high sugar granola bars that use market phrases like "an excellent source of energy." In the context of food, energy equals calories, and while I strongly support renewable energy (and most food is renewable except for coal fritters) I think America needs more energy conservation at the dinner table.

P.S. Dennis said that my mug shot for the Wisconsin Public Utility Institute looks like the charmer you used for an image in this post.

Anonymous said...

Hmm... I'd have to say Reeses Puffs. I barely buy them anymore because they are so expensive and sugary.
Scott

Schmidty said...

golden grahams!

eat them all the time.